It recently came into my awareness that in all of the podcast episodes that I’ve done..All of the posts that I’ve made..
All the memes that I’ve shared…
I have yet to really share specifics of my personal philosophy…
I’ve shared ideas about it. It’s hinted at in the quotes I find inspirational. I’ve shared testimony about universal laws that I know to be true.
But specifics about my personal philosophy?
Nope.
I realized with this omission that defining my personal philosophy in a public forum is vital to my success. Add to that, it could have been a blockage for me in connecting with my friends and listeners of my show… Until now.
The mere act of documenting my personal philosophy could be liberating and a blessing; both to me and to those that read it.. Over the next few weeks I will be more deliberate in sharing those specifics here.
Starting now.
One thing that is completely engrained in me and how I work has to do with the way that I approach ‘improvement’ and ‘expansion’ with those I come in contact with.
I am the type of person that doesn’t interfere in the growth and development of another person unless I’ve been asked to.
When someone close to me acts in a way that I don’t agree with I’ve rarely been the guy that interjects myself into their life. If I see habits that do not support a happy life, I let it lie. I’m supportive and loving and make myself available as a support, but have never felt it was my place to step in until they come to me; wanting my help.
In my experience, there have always been too many things that I don’t know. and it’s not my place to judge. Each person has a part of their life that isn’t public and has battles I could never understand. For me to jump in unsolicited would be a sign of disrespect and thwart the divine responsibility that person has to figure out their own path. It’s not my place to disrupt that part of their journey.
On the flip side, the same level of respect and trust I have for an individual to find their way is met by an equal of amount of disdain when I am not offered the same for my choices. I am repelled by the underlying nature of what it really means and I emotionally remove myself from their lives and rarely look back. If you disagree with my life and/or choices and come at me unsolicited you run the risk of quickly being out of my life..
The mantra “Am I My Brother’s Keeper, Yes I Am” gets misunderstood by many to mean that we have to interfere.
Don’t get it twisted. The real-life experience of this type of intervention is mostly destructive.
Every single time that has happened in my life it has caused irreparable damage to the relationship. Those relationships don’t ever return to their former endearment.
My reasons behind this stems from the respect I have in the process. I know that my close associates can figure their live out for themselves. If they want my help, I will gladly be a soft place to land, offer love and support. If anything, when I disagree with how another lives I feel more motivated to be an example worthy of helping them so they’d feel more comfortable to approach me.
It’s the difference of “giving a gift” or “being the gift.”
As a coach, I know unequivocally that until the student is ready, no amount of forced curriculum will make a difference.
They have to be ready.
When it comes to friends who live in ways I don’t agree with? It’s even more important to respect that boundary in the relationship. So important that it’s key to the success of the relationship.
So, I wait. I express love and support. I live out loud. Making sure I am ready.
Until that happens; I stay out of it.
-BP
